Category: Thoughts

Intimacy… A need or just a hoax?

It’s a common conception that all human beings crave intimacy. It’s considered as one of the few important stuffs a human needs to experience… you know before they have their eulogies written. Everyone seeks this comfort, the comfort of human touch, the tingling pleasure of cuddling, the satiated state attained by holding hands, the mutual care for each other. I, being a human, also seek the aforementioned things as much, but I did something that always spoils these intimate emotions… I thought. I brought my brain into the arena that exclusively houses the delicate yet strong emotions. And the realities I discovered were so awesome that I thought everyone should atleast give this thought process some time. When I went into the depths as to why we seek intimacy that I got some answers. And it also got me asking these questions to myself: Should intimacy really be taking so much space in our minds? Does it really deserve the obsession and time we give to it? Isn’t intimacy over-rated? Isn’t there anything else that could fill up its place? Is intimacy irreplaceable?
 
Image Credit:: Sumaiya

In a perfect world; yes!

But, in the world we live in, a big NO. We have incorporated it so deep in our world that thinking of a life without it, is like a kid without a candy.
In my opinion, intimacy is just a part of life and shouldn’t be considered as something, which is as vital as breathing. If intimacy gets the place it deserves, the most apt analogy I can think of is of a very addictive parasite waiting for you to pass through it.
I believe that intimacy, like our other cravings is just an infatuation, which is fuelled up temporarily by our surroundings and should be given time to diagnose how much intensity is there. The most important element spreading such parasites are the movies that we watch, which are meant for entertainment, but are slowly becoming trendsetters. Everyone wants to incorporate the lives of our protagonists into our lives, the same melodrama, and the same level of connection.
It’s the movies that make every person crave for the physical as well as emotional intimacy. Not every person requires this stuff. According to my philosophy, every person has some tasks to accomplish, some goals to achieve and dreams to shatter. Some get intimacy in their lives, and some don’t. But what movies do is that they overrate these stuffs so much that getting a first-hand experience seems like a necessary thing to do.
For example, if a person craves, let’s say for something other than intimacy, then he doesn’t know how much that craving means to him because no movie has been produced that portrays/exemplify that particular trait. He would never know to how much extent he wants that unless he achieves it or ends up disgracing himself in the hunt. And if it’s just a slight appetence, he may lose sight of it in the wilderness of other desires.

 

My point is that some deserve it and some don’t. If one gets it, he should cherish it with all his might. For the “unlucky” ones, they shouldn’t forcibly try to explore that dimension, while they can actually be expending their time doing something that deserves their time. Going after something that is going to give them pain and hopelessness isn’t a great choice, especially when the world out there needs you and is calling YOU!

Make an appointment with yourself!

For the past few weeks that I became a morning person, I never seemed to enjoy the freshness that the morning used to hold, until last week, when I went for a solitude walk and boy!!! it was fun. Ya! I know we need to enjoy company of others and try to stay away as much as possible from/being a social outcast, but after such a long time I have felt peace within myself. I sensed calmness and serenity within myself which got me thinking about how in whole of my graduation life, I was never alone. One of the most prominent feature of college life is that you always have company. You don’t often get the peaceful time with yourself that you deserve.
Image Credit: Sumaiya

Though time spent with company, and I mean it in the sweetest of tones, is one that we cherish all our life and one mustn’t miss those opportunities, but here we are going to talk about the prospects that being solitude brings to the table. It’s sort of like a wisdom walk of ‘How I met your mother’ fame  and as Ted Mosby would say “I want you to go outside and simply put your hands on stuff that you interact daily, observe the beautiful rustling of leaves, feel the trees’ pulse, listen to the stories the streets are telling you.” I want you to do to the same, but with less dramatics and even less creepiness.

I have even started to look forward to such quality time with myself. The time gives me the chance to reflect upon my previous actions, think hard about a problem and take them down with well-thought out measures.
You can think of this as a modern day sibling of meditation. Meditation has long been known as a method to concentrate your mind and make it more focussed. And, since finding time specifically for meditation is a big impossibility; taking a solitude walk maybe a way to go.  I know that when I started doing this more often, it brought a remarkable positive changes to my whole attitude towards the materialistic world and its devised components.
 
Biggest perks:
* No risk of running out of topics.
* You can be 100% yourself.
* No one can judge you or your opinions.
* Hassle-free thought process.

 

The interesting part of this article is that I wrote most of the drafts whilst on the walks. Mornings are actually perfect time to have these conversations with yourself.  So if you ever need to talk about your problems, dig deep into them and actually need a solution, make an appointment with yourself.

A brand named India!

Its year 2030…and I just came across an e-article about Uttarakhand floods. Man! That was a real disaster. While researching around this article, I also realized that 2012-13 was a year filled with utter humiliation for Indian chauvinists. Newspapers crowded with news that could easily force your smiling curves inverted.
The dilapidating state of country was perspicuous in economic, social and humanitarian sense. My memory is fading and so it’s hard to remember how the shaking boat survived the drowning, but one thing’s I can bet on, we sure were close to reaching a deadlock where the scenario could have been described by even bad and ominous adjectives.
The political setup of India, both centre and state administration was seeing the lowest that it can be. I don’t know how we got through that horrendous phase where hopelessness, lawlessness and scrutiny of sincerity prevailed. Inconsiderate governance, apathetic politicians, slackly decisions, foraying into personal lives were just some gifts presented to citizens by our so-called ‘public servants’. The prevailing conditions were far cry from the promises of the incumbents.
The highlights of those times included falling rupee, the division of telangana, the national surveillance program, uncountable mid-day meal laxities, the disastrous National Food Bill among another national issues. In the local section the violence related with reservations, the suspension of SDM Durga Shakti Nagpal made the news constantly. Do you know, in UP, around 50 IAS officers are transferred every month. And this trend has been followed up for more than a decade now.
                Anyways these weren’t the only issues of let-down…these were following a long list of scams namely Coalgate, Commonwealth games, 2G auction, Chopper gate scams were just some major ones.
                Those were the times when utter helplessness and frustration marked over any discussions regarding India’s scenario. Patriotism was seriously taking lot of hits. I had seen the real patriotic souls on the verge of giving up on the country. The spark that enthused them was slowly fading followed by more impuissance. The times were so dark that leaving India looked eminent and substantial to a quality living. But as you can observe things are better now. The frustrated sense is no more acting now. The inevitable phase that no democracy has ever dodged was handled efficiently by our now developed India (of 2030). A new India rose from near ashes, with the efforts from bureaucrats, politicians and common man. Perhaps finding the right tuning to work with each other was the key.

 

Nature’s Wrath Yatra

11 days and more than thousand feared dead since the Uttarakhand disaster occurred and still rescue operations are at run. One cannot even begin to explain the trauma and suffering the people there have gone through. Showing its fury, nature struck to suddenly stamp out hundreds in the name of maintaining balance. There’s no fighting the nature’s wrath.
 
As the attitude of a person during glee and glum day tells a lot about his character; similarly a country’s character is quite aptly observed during calamities and certainly my opinion this time is towards the positive side. The way the pilgrims have been helped and comforted by various-not-less-than-God-like Indian army personal directly and by relief funds’ accumulators indirectly has been too overwhelming to describe, especially when the early monsoon has been a constant opposition to the rescue operations. It has foiled many such efforts and the short windows it has provided in its absence weren’t of much help either.  
It makes me think how it’s kind of ironic that people believe that God is taking care of them and is watching over them; but here people are at unease, to say the least, due to a ritual that is supposed to keep God contented. Then I heard about a village close to Kedarnath that is determined to help victims by offering them food and shelter till their reserves end. Such vicarious compassion shown by villagers is truly shows the high spirited and giving nature that Indians have been historically known for. Then there is heroic Indian army best illustrating this quality. They have been on a constant alert to ensure the relief operations do not lax. Around 19000 pilgrims have already been evacuated and Uttarakhand government has promised to complete the evacuation within 72 hours.
 
Believe it or not, I believe, Uttarakhand calamity had brought Indians a little closer; the stories sharing the grief and pain of losing or being separated by the loved ones, the apathy by some poor souls, the helplessness mixed with fear….thanks to media for acquainting us with the condition about the stranded pilgrims and Indian Army for their hospitality shown to the rescued in their camps after saving them from the stranded lands, thanks to all the individuals who contributed to relief funds(especially CRPF and BSF jawans for cutting in from their salary)….this disaster has taught us a genuine lesson about humanity……hope we all keep that flame of humanity burning!!!

And let’s pray for those stuck in inaccessible areas that Indian Army reaches them soon!

 

Jai Hind!!!

LEARN TO SAY ‘NO’

We are social animals, we tend to form groups, everyone has a group of friends where he’s comfortable and can hurl as much abuses as he is capable of. Also, no matter how much creepy the teasing gets, one has to imbibe every bit of it. Groups can’t be completed without that person who gets teased the most, the guy with the best relationship advices (but oddly he’s still single), the guy who gets virtually-raped every year at holi…
                The sort of person that I am going to talk about is the mix with shades of a sycophant and a person with a clean image. This person is not bad per se; has a decent level of self-respect, may connect with you with ease, and may be the most talented…..but one thing’s for sure; he’ll be sanguine and charming as hell in his conduct.  I am sure you all have one or two acquaintances possessing these traits. As common as this trait is, as such, it is also not tough to demarcate such qualities in a person.
                When given a task, this person takes on the responsibility with utmost sincerity even if the task is not his cup of tea. Saying ‘NO’ to something wouldn’t cost him anything, but for him, saying no is the only one thing he can’t do. He may fail the task, but renouncing the task is the last thing on his to-do list. I believe that quitting the task and honestly accepting the truth is much better than having to give explanation later. That’s why I look upon such persons with a little caution. There is no shame in relinquishing a little control.
Another scenario where presence of such individuals hurt most is when the person is at some higher position and one seeks help from him. Instead of just clearing his stand, he would give a false impression of trying to help; but instead, in reality, he’s just making you visit him over and over again. It seems as if their motto is “Promise today, equivocation tomorrow”. In India, the babus are infamously popular for such acts. Be it the kutcheris, banks or any ‘Sarkari Suvidha Kendra’, wherever you go, you are queued to be victimised. Indian governance system isn’t un-swayed by this.
                Then there are individuals who can’t deny a favour to a friend on face but try to gain sympathy of randoms by talking behind his back. C’mon yaar, Be a MAN (or Be a wise woman), I strongly suggest you to talk about why you can’t grant him the favour, or why you can’t do his work,; may be he’s a better person than you and he might understand your situation. It’s better to be strong first and say no than having to make efforts to placate the lost friendship and be off the hook later.
                I have seen some girls who don’t quite enjoy the company of certain individuals around her, but she can’t get rid of them, because she can’t have ‘the conversation’, or in simpler terms can’t say NO to them.
Thereby, I am running a collective request to such individuals to please understand what I am trying to say and think about how easier your life can be after you work on the advice.

Preimage

Today I am going to talk about a disease I like to call preimage.
Making out a person just by his first impression is a habit nearly every person has…be it the person working in an MNC, be it the neighbour, be it the shy girl at school, the glass half full guy, 
We all are the victims of this malpractice, and the evil users too…
The first impression of a person (especially a bad one) is stuck so strongly to our minds that even loads of positive work is not conducive of changing that clinging preimage. They don’t realize that humans learn from their mistakes and are worthy of a second chance.
Another common disorder that people have and that’s even gross is making a preimage on the basis of looks of a person.
When God, in his infinite wisdom created us, he wouldn’t have thought that the outer package that he is giving us, would heed so much of importance in the society…the better the outer package, the better the preimage.

A person who may have been your biggest foe may turn out to be gregarious at a later time of your life.
Your best friend is the one that you spent most of your time with and not the one that had the best outer package.

Considering and being aware of what all stupidity, humans are capable of; this one marks out as the most stupid and illogical.

Being on the receiving end sure sucks, and I can tell you by experience, that being on the other end (let’s call him Mr. X) doesn’t bring you any awesomeness either.
The biggest damage is done when you have a day-to-day interaction with the other person. Instead of keeping aside the feelings, X colludes his clandestine emotions with workplace ethics. The first impression image affects his judgement, polluting the thought process, and ultimately leading to inevitable fallout between the two, affecting both individuals. Why restrict this discussion to individuals? Infact forming preimage to a group, company, politicians etc, is a common practice that we all see around quite often. Although the image against present-day politicians is a vicarious feeling backed up by clichés, but it’s still similar to the point that I am focussing in one way or the other.
The solution…ha…well avoiding such an experiment and practising discretion is the first advice and secondly, remember the saying:
                                
                                     “Judging a person doesn’t define who they are;
                                                   It defines who you are” 

Think it over!

Read a quote today:
“I think
.
.
.
.
Therefore I am single”
And I was forced to think of the prejudiced thought about thinking. It’s not a covert fact that thinking does takes out a lot of fun of any activity. Instead of thinking it over and over again, if one does give a try to the challenge, it not only shows the brave attitude but gives the person a lifelong experience even if he fails to accomplish the challenge. My philosophy says a challenging life is much better than a risk-free monotonous life. The precious learning that one gets after trying to go for it, instead of holding back the ground is worthless. I have got a perfect example to accentuate my point: There was a friend of mine who liked a girl from his school. He used to see her everyday, but couldn’t muster up enough courage to talk to her or ask her out. It wasn’t as if he couldn’t talk to girls, but his clock stopped working when the girl, say X, was around. Now, the school ended, but there he was, still unable to convey the emotions to her. He still regrets his indecisive state at that time. Had he told X about how he felt about her, what could be the gravest thing that could have happened? She would have said “no” citing some random reasons. But atleast he wouldn’t have the repentness of not knowing what she would have said.
          Thinking is okay till one considers all of the possibilities and consequences of taking a step, but when it goes one-step ahead to a stage where procrastination peeks from behind the door, it’s time to follow the steps below. It’s not like I will tell you to make a pro and con list, but it sure looks like a textbook solution for most of the doubts, isn’t it? I am just kidding; here are some of the points to keep in mind when you are in such turmoil.
1.       Just do it: The best way; forget about the consequences and just step out. Future prospects are the things that stop you from taking a decision, so take it out of the thinking equation.
2.       Think the right way: Really think hard if you really want it and if it actually helps you in achieving your goals. If the answer is yes, then you know what you have to do.
3.       Ask your intuition: These kinds of confusions are really solved by following one’s intuition. There is a saying ‘Follow your intuition and everything will fall into place’. This is as true as gravitation theory. If you are indecisive about something, trying out your intuition isn’t the worst of options.
4.       Discuss with one: Taking advices is not really a thing that most experts would advice. But from my experience, there is a person in every one’s life with whom we feel comfortable such that sharing anything is as easy as slicing butter. Find that person that is most adept about the theme of your doubt and who is understands you enough to provide you with a better perspective. The person can be your lover, closest friend, college mate, hostel mate, parents, sibling or a school mate. And it’s better to take advice from a few individuals only. 

Imagination gone puff!

Read it somewhere on the internet, but it really paints the picture merely from words.
                “9 year old today have Facebook, Twitter, phones, and iPods.
                When I was their age, I had colouring books, crayons, chalk and imagination.”
Well, at first, it may sound absurd, but the truth is that’s what has happened with the human evolution after the introduction of TV’s, Computer and other digital devices capable of showing us what only our naked eye could have shown, a century ago. This may seem rhetoric, but you will realize that just how apt it is when you think about it seriously.
                There were methods to stay creative, knowingly or unknowingly, the brain in way of processing our daily activities found necessary ingredients that helped it stay fit and healthy. But the unhealthy timetable of a person nowadays is either so hectic or so ‘lazy-like’ that it is affecting the brain in a bad way.
We, as kids, used to go to the terraces when the electricity wasn’t there and certainly not worried about when will the electricity be back again…we would do all kinds of stuff, enjoy the calmness beneath the sky, the refreshing breezy air, succumbing to the Mother Nature and yet appreciating the beauty of it. There would be an open exchange of ideas, the thoughts pouring in on the open minds: that’s all you need to get an out of box idea, isn’t it? But, nowadays, the common trend is being engrossed in TVs, video games, playstations, PSPs, Facebook etc. With no time for building their thought process, the probability that they might contribute something fruitful to the society looks a bit diminishing. Why only kids or students, parents too aren’t impregnable by these activities. Nowadays, an average office-going person spends more than a third of his day at his office cubicle and when he returns home, is again entrapped in a bigger cubicle, only this time he has a television in front of him. Some even take their professional work to home.
I am not asking to put a ban on the television etc., it’s true that it’s a way creative people show their skills to the world via the daily soaps, reality gigs, game shows, movies etc but inadvertently they are putting the imaginative bird of the viewers to sleep. Yes, that is arguably true, because your brain can work as much you want it to be, but give it a hint of distraction and it switches itself off. These are acting like distraction and putting our mind away from the real thing for which the brain is made up for. Our brain is not compatible with such long viewing hours of televisions or anything of that sort.
 Now hours of thinking have been replaced with hours of TV sitting, talking face to face with friends has been replaced with communication via social networking. It’s not healthy; neither for any individual’s health nor for the society.  The solution to this remains an enigma.* But can be circumcised by a little awareness from the parents. Being aware of this problem is also a big success while working towards the solution. Giving a limited time to the digital Medias may help too. Earn some time for yourself, and think about who are you, how have you been living? Daydream about what you want. Daydream is actually our brain’s way of getting us to creatively focus on what it is we really want. These solutions may not be easy to follow, but will surely bring your life back to track.

God particle isn’t in the hands of God anymore

The discovery has been finally made. The Standard model of quantum physics holds true. The researches and the hard work put up by Peter Higgs and his team of scientists has finally paid dividends. When Higgs gave the theoretical model of this particle back in 1964, very few accepted it; infact he was mocked. When the science community was expecting the found particle to be the Higgs-boson particle, Stephen Hawking even lost a 100$ bet with Gordon Kane (of Michigan University), that the results would be different. Well, a little heads up for those who are expecting concrete results; CERN says they have found a new particle with 99.999% certainty, it will take some time to confirm the found particle is indeed the much speculated Higgs-boson or not.
                The particle is nicknamed the ‘God particle’ (obviously by non-scientists), that brought the attention of media towards this research and resulted in the jaw-dropping publicity and may have offended some theists due to its nickname.
                To know more about the whole story, let’s take you back a few years back.  A Large Hadron Collider (LHC) was built by CERN (European Organization for Nuclear Research) in 2008 (actually it took about 10 years to be built), at the Swiss- French border near Geneva. Laid in a 27 km length, it was setup to validate the existence of the Higgs- boson experimentally. According to the theory, two 7 TeV proton beams collide to create an environment for observing the Higgs-boson particle. Currently, the LHC can accelerate protons to 4 TeV only, but soon it will be upgraded for optimum work. For getting better results, researches were carried out by two teams working independently to ensure that the results that are going to follow don’t look like a fluke. However, after combining datasets of the two teams, CMS and ATLAS, the results looked consistent and promising.
                It all started when bosons was discovered in the mid 1920s, which are nothing but subatomic particles with integer spin. The bosons is named after Satyendra Nath Bose, who did pioneering work in Bose- Einstein statistics, along with Einstein. The Higgs boson is an elementary boson, having no spin, is believed to give mass to other particles via the Higgs mechanism. According to this mechanism, a particle gains mass in a Higgs field, in the presence of some fundamental particles. One of the fundamental particle is Higgs boson.
                Well! long story short, if the synthesized particle is proved to be the Higgs boson, it will surely be a major breakthrough for science. Plus it will firmly cement the Standard model in science community.

Change the Game

With the advent of EURO CUP-12 and departure of IPL, the tide of entertainment has turned to football once again. The football fever is catching people by surprise. I mean that’s not normal in India where cricket is a religion and cricketers gods. But the time has changed now and the new ‘Gods’ are rising!
When I realized this shift in trends, I was forced to ponder, what on earth is wrong with people of India. What changed? Where is the mob that devoted themselves for cricket? Where are those people of small cities that relied on radios for the latest scores? Where are the toddlers that knew no other game than cricket which they played even in the scorching sun? What is bringing the dismissal of cricket as the ‘major sporting event’?
 The answer lies in the following paragraph.
 One of the major reasons that football is taking over the world is that there is a whole lot more passion in this game. The crowd, the jeering, the Mexican waves, the enchanting, the loyalties; all entwine together to make it an exquisite entertainer. Now, unlike cricket, football doesn’t has to break-off every five minutes, thus the momentum and thrill is maintained. Audience can enjoy 90 minutes of pure athleticism without boredom. Plus the 90 min limit enables one to plan out everything before and after the game. The thrill and excitement knows no bound, and the non-anticipatory action adds salt to the taste. Maybe, the business mindset of IPL’s accounts for the lost interest in the game, or it may be the overdose of it. In all, football gives a totally different feel that is not insured in the willow driven game.  At a teenage level, since it requires not much arrangement; just grab a ball (for starters) and remember few ground-rules, and you are ready to go. It may not be the best choice in the sultry summers of India, but who cares when you have donned a Messi’s jersey and have the ball. The passion driving makes up for the fatigue.
So, don’t be surprised the next time you see the teenagers following up the ‘Change the game’ mantra……because football is the next big thing after cricket that’s going to surface on Indian subcontinent soon.