Category: Thoughts

Deciding Passions!


HOW TO DECIDE WHAT TO DO IN LIFE?
Someone recently asked me this question and it got me in a tizzy. Isn’t life supposed to be easy? Why decide on life’s rhetoric questions?
But as it turns out, the world is not too kind to accept a person who doesn’t know where he will be after 5 years. The world seeks visionaries who can command and take us forward.
I believed I accepted this too. But after a lot of thinking, I now have a different take on this.
In my opinion, asking this question isn’t the way to go. Finding what you want for real, is not an obligation, rather it’s a baggage. I would rather concentrate on seeking what I like. There are hobbies and there is passion. The difference between them and the importance they hold should be known by all.
Ideally, the thing that you are most passionate about should be the way to go (and an answer to this question too). But life is more complicated than that. So, a major prerequisite is to decide priorities.
If your priority is money and fame in future, then you may need a plan to move ahead. Strategy would be required as it’s hard to satiate since there is no end to the accumulated wealth.
However, if one’s aim is happiness, then there is no need for all the hoopla. Just rely on your passion, it will get you home.
Difference between aim and hobby in this context is that aim is one or set of hobbies for which one is passionate upto that extent as Johny Bravo was passionate about his looks.
Aims in our life keep us focused sharply while our hobbies keep us stable. A synergy of both is a necessary prerequisite to a happy life. Well, not exactly life, but they keep us satisfied while still wanting for more in a sweet way.
Seek what you like rather than answering a much vaguer question, finding answer to which is typically hard to find even for the mature ones, let alone a confused teenager.
Life is really full of possibilities, if you have the strength to believe so.

Allah(ke)abad!

Allahabad, a city that every country deserves, but not the one it may need right now. While Allahabad is an excellent city per se, but has been clouded by some very unfortunate mishappenings. The wrath of bhaiyas of Allahabad still enounces on my mind even when I am 356 kms away from it. How a city welcomes a guest greatly defines a city. Allahabad welcomed me with dahi-jalebi and introduced me to the ever-tasty bun-omelette, which even after four years of continuous eating remains a favourite day-starting breakfast.

WHAT I WOULD MISS!
The discussions over bun-omelette and tea in the morning as well as evening. The serenity of Saraswati ghat was one I would crave a lot. Some destinations leave an everlasting footprints in your minds; Saraswati ghat is one such place. The people of Allahabad are also very versatile in giving opinions(reminds me of Gorakhpur, but Allahabad is a tad violent :p). If you are even a little interested in politics, this is a place to be. You never know, you may get acquainted by a future minister of state. Giving opinion boldly, come what may, is in the blood of an east UP person and Allahabad kinds of leads in that trait.
Being in the center of independence fight, gave this city a gift of great historic significance. The Azad Park commemorates Chandrashekhar Azad’s martyrdom. While the Sangam area and Naini bridge adds to the aesthetics of the place.

WHAT I WOULDN’T MISS!
Ofcourse the young successors of Indian politics, the student leaders…the most feared species in whole of Allahabad. Want people to concede to your demands, call the species; want to take revenge from someone who wasn’t giving you a pass on the road, call the species; don’t want to study today, call the species in havoc mode; want to get even with the professor for his tyrant ways, call them. From the innocuous thelawalas to the helpless VCs, they assert their authority everywhere.
Being crammed in the auto-rickshaws comes next in the list. You are living in the city, your girlfriend has called you to meet at this great restaurant, you did your hair, applied gel, worked on it for God knows how long, put on your best set of clothes and go to makeshift auto-stand feeling great about your life when suddenly an auto comes at the station, with the conductor yelling ‘tation-tation’ (in case you missed, its station with a silent ‘s’), you enter the auto and two sweat drenched aunties block the exit to the auto. You are thinking it’s just 10 minutes away, but the auto-wala will stop at the place where the scorching sun shines the most and make you pay for all the past life sins. He will wait for more unlucky souls, until his auto looks like a scene where we are attempting the Guinness Book of World Record for cramming the most persons in an auto.
Another interesting thing is that Allahabadis have adopted this system, they don’t mind sharing that seat with three more broad-assed individuals. Even if he gets one of his buttocks in place, he won’t complain.
But overall, Allahabad invites you and takes care of you if you adapt the city well, that’s an assurity I can give, being a former resident of this city. But still, do take care :p

Discovered happiness!

“The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise. It is not that we seize them, but they seize us.” –Ashley Montagu

Recently, I got an opportunity to experience this quote first-hand. Well yesterday, we went for ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ and what we thought would be the highlight of the day was totally eclipsed by what we discovered just before the movie began. We reached early to the mall and so we had solid one hour before the action began. We decided to go for KFC to have lunch. We were 14 in number and were deciding what to order and clearly taking a lot of space. A staff motioned us to get in line and then decide. He wasn’t saying anything, but just instructing us to get in line. I found it rude, but ignored it. Later on, I was told by my friend that he was deaf and mute. I realized it now that this KFC had a different aura altogether and it didn’t had the unnecessary chatter of the staffers that we usually experience in the franchisees. I observed that nearly every staff there was using sign language to communicate with other staffs or using gestures to communicate with the customers, and all that with a smile that will melt your heart. There was an air of confidence emanating from everyone working there, which was unaffected by the curious stares by the ongoing crowd. I was eagerly waiting for my turn to order, because I wanted to get the feel of communicating with the person and to see how they coped up with the standards set by KFC. And yes, as expected, the transaction was flawless. I pointed out my order and the person at the counter asked me the quantity and I gestured it too, then after confirming the order from the screen, he politely directed me out of the queue and proceeded to serve the next customer.

KFC’s initiative to employ deaf and mute persons in front-end jobs is surely commendable. Firstly, it gives them a respectable place in society earning their own bread and not depending on any relatives. And secondly, it gives them a lot of similar people in their company. This will ensure that they are in a community where everyone can readily communicate with them. The world certainly looks a nice place when you experience such nice chapters. We were so elated that we kept talking about them and agreed that this initiative should be carried on to every self-service franchises.

A little research reflected that this move was first initiated by Virag Joshi, CEO of Devyani International Limited, which runs Pizza Hut, KFC, Vaango and Costa Coffee chains in India. Really felt proud after getting acquainted with the fact that the move has been a great success so far, with the special KFCs at par with every other KFC in town. At Devyani International, they are given a training of 2 months to excel at communicating and handling customer requirements. Hats off to such an initiative by the man whose team was honoured for executing this successfully, which instils a ‘feel good’ factor in both customers and employees mind-set.

The world definitely requires such moves and positively enough there is no dearth of such leaders that can use such ideas and more to keep the spirit of humanity alive.

Intimacy… A need or just a hoax?

It’s a common conception that all human beings crave intimacy. It’s considered as one of the few important stuffs a human needs to experience… you know before they have their eulogies written. Everyone seeks this comfort, the comfort of human touch, the tingling pleasure of cuddling, the satiated state attained by holding hands, the mutual care for each other. I, being a human, also seek the aforementioned things as much, but I did something that always spoils these intimate emotions… I thought. I brought my brain into the arena that exclusively houses the delicate yet strong emotions. And the realities I discovered were so awesome that I thought everyone should atleast give this thought process some time. When I went into the depths as to why we seek intimacy that I got some answers. And it also got me asking these questions to myself: Should intimacy really be taking so much space in our minds? Does it really deserve the obsession and time we give to it? Isn’t intimacy over-rated? Isn’t there anything else that could fill up its place? Is intimacy irreplaceable?
 
Image Credit:: Sumaiya

In a perfect world; yes!

But, in the world we live in, a big NO. We have incorporated it so deep in our world that thinking of a life without it, is like a kid without a candy.
In my opinion, intimacy is just a part of life and shouldn’t be considered as something, which is as vital as breathing. If intimacy gets the place it deserves, the most apt analogy I can think of is of a very addictive parasite waiting for you to pass through it.
I believe that intimacy, like our other cravings is just an infatuation, which is fuelled up temporarily by our surroundings and should be given time to diagnose how much intensity is there. The most important element spreading such parasites are the movies that we watch, which are meant for entertainment, but are slowly becoming trendsetters. Everyone wants to incorporate the lives of our protagonists into our lives, the same melodrama, and the same level of connection.
It’s the movies that make every person crave for the physical as well as emotional intimacy. Not every person requires this stuff. According to my philosophy, every person has some tasks to accomplish, some goals to achieve and dreams to shatter. Some get intimacy in their lives, and some don’t. But what movies do is that they overrate these stuffs so much that getting a first-hand experience seems like a necessary thing to do.
For example, if a person craves, let’s say for something other than intimacy, then he doesn’t know how much that craving means to him because no movie has been produced that portrays/exemplify that particular trait. He would never know to how much extent he wants that unless he achieves it or ends up disgracing himself in the hunt. And if it’s just a slight appetence, he may lose sight of it in the wilderness of other desires.

 

My point is that some deserve it and some don’t. If one gets it, he should cherish it with all his might. For the “unlucky” ones, they shouldn’t forcibly try to explore that dimension, while they can actually be expending their time doing something that deserves their time. Going after something that is going to give them pain and hopelessness isn’t a great choice, especially when the world out there needs you and is calling YOU!

Make an appointment with yourself!

For the past few weeks that I became a morning person, I never seemed to enjoy the freshness that the morning used to hold, until last week, when I went for a solitude walk and boy!!! it was fun. Ya! I know we need to enjoy company of others and try to stay away as much as possible from/being a social outcast, but after such a long time I have felt peace within myself. I sensed calmness and serenity within myself which got me thinking about how in whole of my graduation life, I was never alone. One of the most prominent feature of college life is that you always have company. You don’t often get the peaceful time with yourself that you deserve.
Image Credit: Sumaiya

Though time spent with company, and I mean it in the sweetest of tones, is one that we cherish all our life and one mustn’t miss those opportunities, but here we are going to talk about the prospects that being solitude brings to the table. It’s sort of like a wisdom walk of ‘How I met your mother’ fame  and as Ted Mosby would say “I want you to go outside and simply put your hands on stuff that you interact daily, observe the beautiful rustling of leaves, feel the trees’ pulse, listen to the stories the streets are telling you.” I want you to do to the same, but with less dramatics and even less creepiness.

I have even started to look forward to such quality time with myself. The time gives me the chance to reflect upon my previous actions, think hard about a problem and take them down with well-thought out measures.
You can think of this as a modern day sibling of meditation. Meditation has long been known as a method to concentrate your mind and make it more focussed. And, since finding time specifically for meditation is a big impossibility; taking a solitude walk maybe a way to go.  I know that when I started doing this more often, it brought a remarkable positive changes to my whole attitude towards the materialistic world and its devised components.
 
Biggest perks:
* No risk of running out of topics.
* You can be 100% yourself.
* No one can judge you or your opinions.
* Hassle-free thought process.

 

The interesting part of this article is that I wrote most of the drafts whilst on the walks. Mornings are actually perfect time to have these conversations with yourself.  So if you ever need to talk about your problems, dig deep into them and actually need a solution, make an appointment with yourself.

A brand named India!

Its year 2030…and I just came across an e-article about Uttarakhand floods. Man! That was a real disaster. While researching around this article, I also realized that 2012-13 was a year filled with utter humiliation for Indian chauvinists. Newspapers crowded with news that could easily force your smiling curves inverted.
The dilapidating state of country was perspicuous in economic, social and humanitarian sense. My memory is fading and so it’s hard to remember how the shaking boat survived the drowning, but one thing’s I can bet on, we sure were close to reaching a deadlock where the scenario could have been described by even bad and ominous adjectives.
The political setup of India, both centre and state administration was seeing the lowest that it can be. I don’t know how we got through that horrendous phase where hopelessness, lawlessness and scrutiny of sincerity prevailed. Inconsiderate governance, apathetic politicians, slackly decisions, foraying into personal lives were just some gifts presented to citizens by our so-called ‘public servants’. The prevailing conditions were far cry from the promises of the incumbents.
The highlights of those times included falling rupee, the division of telangana, the national surveillance program, uncountable mid-day meal laxities, the disastrous National Food Bill among another national issues. In the local section the violence related with reservations, the suspension of SDM Durga Shakti Nagpal made the news constantly. Do you know, in UP, around 50 IAS officers are transferred every month. And this trend has been followed up for more than a decade now.
                Anyways these weren’t the only issues of let-down…these were following a long list of scams namely Coalgate, Commonwealth games, 2G auction, Chopper gate scams were just some major ones.
                Those were the times when utter helplessness and frustration marked over any discussions regarding India’s scenario. Patriotism was seriously taking lot of hits. I had seen the real patriotic souls on the verge of giving up on the country. The spark that enthused them was slowly fading followed by more impuissance. The times were so dark that leaving India looked eminent and substantial to a quality living. But as you can observe things are better now. The frustrated sense is no more acting now. The inevitable phase that no democracy has ever dodged was handled efficiently by our now developed India (of 2030). A new India rose from near ashes, with the efforts from bureaucrats, politicians and common man. Perhaps finding the right tuning to work with each other was the key.

 

Nature’s Wrath Yatra

11 days and more than thousand feared dead since the Uttarakhand disaster occurred and still rescue operations are at run. One cannot even begin to explain the trauma and suffering the people there have gone through. Showing its fury, nature struck to suddenly stamp out hundreds in the name of maintaining balance. There’s no fighting the nature’s wrath.
 
As the attitude of a person during glee and glum day tells a lot about his character; similarly a country’s character is quite aptly observed during calamities and certainly my opinion this time is towards the positive side. The way the pilgrims have been helped and comforted by various-not-less-than-God-like Indian army personal directly and by relief funds’ accumulators indirectly has been too overwhelming to describe, especially when the early monsoon has been a constant opposition to the rescue operations. It has foiled many such efforts and the short windows it has provided in its absence weren’t of much help either.  
It makes me think how it’s kind of ironic that people believe that God is taking care of them and is watching over them; but here people are at unease, to say the least, due to a ritual that is supposed to keep God contented. Then I heard about a village close to Kedarnath that is determined to help victims by offering them food and shelter till their reserves end. Such vicarious compassion shown by villagers is truly shows the high spirited and giving nature that Indians have been historically known for. Then there is heroic Indian army best illustrating this quality. They have been on a constant alert to ensure the relief operations do not lax. Around 19000 pilgrims have already been evacuated and Uttarakhand government has promised to complete the evacuation within 72 hours.
 
Believe it or not, I believe, Uttarakhand calamity had brought Indians a little closer; the stories sharing the grief and pain of losing or being separated by the loved ones, the apathy by some poor souls, the helplessness mixed with fear….thanks to media for acquainting us with the condition about the stranded pilgrims and Indian Army for their hospitality shown to the rescued in their camps after saving them from the stranded lands, thanks to all the individuals who contributed to relief funds(especially CRPF and BSF jawans for cutting in from their salary)….this disaster has taught us a genuine lesson about humanity……hope we all keep that flame of humanity burning!!!

And let’s pray for those stuck in inaccessible areas that Indian Army reaches them soon!

 

Jai Hind!!!

LEARN TO SAY ‘NO’

We are social animals, we tend to form groups, everyone has a group of friends where he’s comfortable and can hurl as much abuses as he is capable of. Also, no matter how much creepy the teasing gets, one has to imbibe every bit of it. Groups can’t be completed without that person who gets teased the most, the guy with the best relationship advices (but oddly he’s still single), the guy who gets virtually-raped every year at holi…
                The sort of person that I am going to talk about is the mix with shades of a sycophant and a person with a clean image. This person is not bad per se; has a decent level of self-respect, may connect with you with ease, and may be the most talented…..but one thing’s for sure; he’ll be sanguine and charming as hell in his conduct.  I am sure you all have one or two acquaintances possessing these traits. As common as this trait is, as such, it is also not tough to demarcate such qualities in a person.
                When given a task, this person takes on the responsibility with utmost sincerity even if the task is not his cup of tea. Saying ‘NO’ to something wouldn’t cost him anything, but for him, saying no is the only one thing he can’t do. He may fail the task, but renouncing the task is the last thing on his to-do list. I believe that quitting the task and honestly accepting the truth is much better than having to give explanation later. That’s why I look upon such persons with a little caution. There is no shame in relinquishing a little control.
Another scenario where presence of such individuals hurt most is when the person is at some higher position and one seeks help from him. Instead of just clearing his stand, he would give a false impression of trying to help; but instead, in reality, he’s just making you visit him over and over again. It seems as if their motto is “Promise today, equivocation tomorrow”. In India, the babus are infamously popular for such acts. Be it the kutcheris, banks or any ‘Sarkari Suvidha Kendra’, wherever you go, you are queued to be victimised. Indian governance system isn’t un-swayed by this.
                Then there are individuals who can’t deny a favour to a friend on face but try to gain sympathy of randoms by talking behind his back. C’mon yaar, Be a MAN (or Be a wise woman), I strongly suggest you to talk about why you can’t grant him the favour, or why you can’t do his work,; may be he’s a better person than you and he might understand your situation. It’s better to be strong first and say no than having to make efforts to placate the lost friendship and be off the hook later.
                I have seen some girls who don’t quite enjoy the company of certain individuals around her, but she can’t get rid of them, because she can’t have ‘the conversation’, or in simpler terms can’t say NO to them.
Thereby, I am running a collective request to such individuals to please understand what I am trying to say and think about how easier your life can be after you work on the advice.

Preimage

Today I am going to talk about a disease I like to call preimage.
Making out a person just by his first impression is a habit nearly every person has…be it the person working in an MNC, be it the neighbour, be it the shy girl at school, the glass half full guy, 
We all are the victims of this malpractice, and the evil users too…
The first impression of a person (especially a bad one) is stuck so strongly to our minds that even loads of positive work is not conducive of changing that clinging preimage. They don’t realize that humans learn from their mistakes and are worthy of a second chance.
Another common disorder that people have and that’s even gross is making a preimage on the basis of looks of a person.
When God, in his infinite wisdom created us, he wouldn’t have thought that the outer package that he is giving us, would heed so much of importance in the society…the better the outer package, the better the preimage.

A person who may have been your biggest foe may turn out to be gregarious at a later time of your life.
Your best friend is the one that you spent most of your time with and not the one that had the best outer package.

Considering and being aware of what all stupidity, humans are capable of; this one marks out as the most stupid and illogical.

Being on the receiving end sure sucks, and I can tell you by experience, that being on the other end (let’s call him Mr. X) doesn’t bring you any awesomeness either.
The biggest damage is done when you have a day-to-day interaction with the other person. Instead of keeping aside the feelings, X colludes his clandestine emotions with workplace ethics. The first impression image affects his judgement, polluting the thought process, and ultimately leading to inevitable fallout between the two, affecting both individuals. Why restrict this discussion to individuals? Infact forming preimage to a group, company, politicians etc, is a common practice that we all see around quite often. Although the image against present-day politicians is a vicarious feeling backed up by clichés, but it’s still similar to the point that I am focussing in one way or the other.
The solution…ha…well avoiding such an experiment and practising discretion is the first advice and secondly, remember the saying:
                                
                                     “Judging a person doesn’t define who they are;
                                                   It defines who you are” 

Think it over!

Read a quote today:
“I think
.
.
.
.
Therefore I am single”
And I was forced to think of the prejudiced thought about thinking. It’s not a covert fact that thinking does takes out a lot of fun of any activity. Instead of thinking it over and over again, if one does give a try to the challenge, it not only shows the brave attitude but gives the person a lifelong experience even if he fails to accomplish the challenge. My philosophy says a challenging life is much better than a risk-free monotonous life. The precious learning that one gets after trying to go for it, instead of holding back the ground is worthless. I have got a perfect example to accentuate my point: There was a friend of mine who liked a girl from his school. He used to see her everyday, but couldn’t muster up enough courage to talk to her or ask her out. It wasn’t as if he couldn’t talk to girls, but his clock stopped working when the girl, say X, was around. Now, the school ended, but there he was, still unable to convey the emotions to her. He still regrets his indecisive state at that time. Had he told X about how he felt about her, what could be the gravest thing that could have happened? She would have said “no” citing some random reasons. But atleast he wouldn’t have the repentness of not knowing what she would have said.
          Thinking is okay till one considers all of the possibilities and consequences of taking a step, but when it goes one-step ahead to a stage where procrastination peeks from behind the door, it’s time to follow the steps below. It’s not like I will tell you to make a pro and con list, but it sure looks like a textbook solution for most of the doubts, isn’t it? I am just kidding; here are some of the points to keep in mind when you are in such turmoil.
1.       Just do it: The best way; forget about the consequences and just step out. Future prospects are the things that stop you from taking a decision, so take it out of the thinking equation.
2.       Think the right way: Really think hard if you really want it and if it actually helps you in achieving your goals. If the answer is yes, then you know what you have to do.
3.       Ask your intuition: These kinds of confusions are really solved by following one’s intuition. There is a saying ‘Follow your intuition and everything will fall into place’. This is as true as gravitation theory. If you are indecisive about something, trying out your intuition isn’t the worst of options.
4.       Discuss with one: Taking advices is not really a thing that most experts would advice. But from my experience, there is a person in every one’s life with whom we feel comfortable such that sharing anything is as easy as slicing butter. Find that person that is most adept about the theme of your doubt and who is understands you enough to provide you with a better perspective. The person can be your lover, closest friend, college mate, hostel mate, parents, sibling or a school mate. And it’s better to take advice from a few individuals only.